I've had several comments on my last post...a few here on the blog, more via e-mail. And while I would never want to re-live that date, I am seeing it in a different light.
Who knows what insecurities or deeply held fears drive any of us to behave in the ways we do? Some people, when confronted with stressful situations, withdraw. Others talk too much, some run, and some lash out, masking their fears with anger and attacks (as in I'll get you before you can get me.)
I don't know this man. I mean I know some things about him...what he chose to tell me before our date. Bits and pieces of what sounds like a very nice childhood and a successful life since then. But I don't know the details. The stuff between the stories. And maybe that's where the REAL story lies.
Clearly, we are not a good match, at least not at this point in our lives. But I do not wish him ill. In fact, I wish him joy.
I hope that someday soon, he will see a full moon on a lovely tropical night and smile (because, just for the record, when he smiled, it was dazzling.) And that someone will break through his walls, and help him to laugh, to take a chance, to dance under the stars, and see beauty for its own sake with no price tag ... and most of all, to hold a hand just for the wonder of connecting with another person for the little time we have here on earth.
Friday 30 November 2007
Tuesday 27 November 2007
Thursday 15 November 2007
Saturday 10 November 2007
My neglected blog
Sometimes it's hard to write because nothing is really happening. Other times, like over the past month, it's hard to write because so much is happening.
1) Things I thought would last have abruptly ended.
2) Things I never expected, have come into my life seemingly from no-where.
3) My work with Project Downtown has moved from a powerful weekly experience to what some of my street friends have called my ministry. I think they are on to something -- it does feel like a calling and I am prividged to minister to these wonderful people.
4) I have discovered that really opening yourself for something good to come into your life, and being clear about what it is you need, can sometimes have amazing results. Maybe "The Secret" isn't such a crazy pie-in-the-sky book after all.
5) At 2 in the morning, when you wake up with tears on your face, it's hard to understand anything...much less the reason in "everything happens for a reason." Sometimes it's not any easier at 2 in the afternoon.
6) When it comes down to it, you prabably have more friends...and better friends...than you think.
7) Having "stuff" is overrated. So are job labels, education labels and family labels. Sometimes we are so focused on the descriptions that we miss the person.
8) These is nothing quite as wonderful as having someone you really love talking with...and having them feel the same way. And there is nothing lonelier than losing that.
...so those are my eight revelations for the month in which I was silent. Ramadan ended, my world changed in good and bad ways. And I am back to my blog.
1) Things I thought would last have abruptly ended.
2) Things I never expected, have come into my life seemingly from no-where.
3) My work with Project Downtown has moved from a powerful weekly experience to what some of my street friends have called my ministry. I think they are on to something -- it does feel like a calling and I am prividged to minister to these wonderful people.
4) I have discovered that really opening yourself for something good to come into your life, and being clear about what it is you need, can sometimes have amazing results. Maybe "The Secret" isn't such a crazy pie-in-the-sky book after all.
5) At 2 in the morning, when you wake up with tears on your face, it's hard to understand anything...much less the reason in "everything happens for a reason." Sometimes it's not any easier at 2 in the afternoon.
6) When it comes down to it, you prabably have more friends...and better friends...than you think.
7) Having "stuff" is overrated. So are job labels, education labels and family labels. Sometimes we are so focused on the descriptions that we miss the person.
8) These is nothing quite as wonderful as having someone you really love talking with...and having them feel the same way. And there is nothing lonelier than losing that.
...so those are my eight revelations for the month in which I was silent. Ramadan ended, my world changed in good and bad ways. And I am back to my blog.
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