The mysteries of high school in Texas

I've lived in a lot of places.  From Florida where I grew up, to years spent in the Rockies, Pennsylvania and even a brief stint in New England, I've experienced a lot of regional "quirks".  But with a daughter now in high school in Texas, the mysteries have deepened.

We thought that the weirdest thing so far was the fact that in Austin even people who don't have kids in the local high school buy season passes to the high school football games. And they really go!

But the "strangeness factor" jumped several degrees yesterday when we accidentally encountered something called "Mums" at the local Michael's. No, these are not the flowers, although a silk version of them is involved.

Texas mums are enormous creations made from silk flowers, too many yards of ribbon to count, stuffed bears, plastic cupcake decorations, Mardis Gras beads, bells, battery-powered Christmas lights and enough hot glue to securely put Humpty Dumpty back together again.  And that's just a "basic mum."

And best all, when these things are all assembled, girls wear them to school! And in some schools, to the Homecoming game as well. They're worn pinned to shirts or jackets (or in some cases to bra straps to keep them from tearing holes in clothes because of the weight of it all), or tied around necks.

Boys get off a bit easier. They wear a smaller version of the traditional mum, attached to a garter and worn on the arm (ideally over a letter jacket, I'm told.  This is, after all, Texas!)

And as if all this silliness wasn't enough, there's the matter of the cost of this autumn high school tradition. This enormous hot-glued bundle of fake flowers and ribbon and do-dads can easily cost hundreds of dollars.  Sometimes over a thousand.

A very basic mum base at Michael's starts at $30.  And from there, girls (or moms or in some cases, boyfriends) are expected to buy and add all the extras from stuffed pets to blinking lights. There are pages and pages online explaining how to make and customize a mum.  And even more sites selling them, all for upwards of $200.

Needless to say, we're going to make our own.  I'm handy with a glue gun.  I found a step-by-step Homecoming mum video.  We stocked up on ribbon using this week's Michael's coupons.  The Mardis Gras beads and tiny stuffed bear are coming from the dollar store.  Not sure about bells or lights.  But we're going to try and keep the cost below $20.

And once it's all done, we'll take a picture or two of our creation as my daughter heads out the door. And I promise not to giggle too much...at least while she can hear me.

Mums, indeed.  Giggle, giggle!

To Everything There is a Season...and Sometimes That Means New Blogs

Austin at Sunset ©Lindsay Shugerman 2011 All Rights Reserved

For now, my season is to be in Texas.  Sure, I'd rather be in Florida.  And I hope that things will work out so we can return home, sooner rather than later.  And I plan to make MANY, MANY trips home in the meantime, to see my friends and my family and my beloved places.

But I have to face facts.  For now I am here, in Austin.  And I can make myself miserable, or I can learn some new things, meet some new people, and work on myself while I'm here so that the person who returns home will be better, more interesting, more sure of herself and have greater depth than the person I was when I left.

This is hard for me.  If I find joy here, I feel like I'm being disloyal to home, and to those I left behind.  I worked hard to get back to Florida after so many years away.  I reconnected with those I had missed for so long, and I met new kindred spirits who also loved South Florida and called it home.

Sailing off Miami ©Lindsay Shugerman 2010 All Rights Reserved

But now I am in a place I do not love.  Where there are no precious memories or dear friends with whom I can reconnect.  I lived other places over the years...and each time, once the dust had settled, and the excitement of exploring a new city, a new state was past, that old familiar call home would begin.  But during those "honeymoon" days or weeks, I had built some connections, found some favorites in the new place.

This time, the excitement never happened.  So now I need to learn a new way to see the world, and my location.

No, it's not going to turn around over night. I will still be homesick, I will still call Florida "Home." But I need to work at finding some reason to like it here, even if "love it here" never happens.

One way I am going to try and make that happen is with some new blogs.  One, which I started in November, focuses on the details I see in the world.  That one will allow me to bring in images I've collected throughout my travels, as well as new things I find here.

The second one will be about Texas style in decorating.  I love texture and aged finishes, and if there's one thing Texas is excellent at, it's aging finishes.  Think of this blog as shabby-chic meets Texas practicality.  I am looking forward to working on that one.

The last one is a family project, and will be all about Austin and the surrounding area.  We've been working on that one, and are almost ready to launch.  By the way, if you're an Austin-area blogger, we will be looking for guest bloggers on that one.

I will still keep this blog, because this is where I share my thoughts, my joys and my sorrows.  I've been neglecting this blog because I was too sad to write, and got tired of seeing my own whining. So  I wrote and deleted, wrote and deleted, without ever hitting that publish button.  Time for that to end.

Watch for links to all three new blogs next week.

Free fall and trust

Image from Samma Samadhi

I will admit it.  I have a problem with trust.

No, not with the little things, like trusting someone else to make the dinner reservations or drive the car pool.  But with the big things.  Like trusting friends to be around when they say they will, or trusting in the universe to provide.

But most of all, I have a problem in the whole idea of trusting someone to take care of me, when I need help.

I won't go into the reasons why.  There are several, and they have left me shaky in many ways. But the why is not important.  It's the effect that matters now.

I am about to leap into a free fall.  And it will involve trusting someone to be there, to take care of me, until I can get my bearings, and find a new direction.  And I am scared.  Really scared.

I love the man I am trusting to catch me.  My husband is an amazing person, a strong, gentle, loving, caring man.

And yet....it's freefall.

I'm scared.

Finding my colors....

I've been struggling trying to find my colors lately.  No, I'm not talking about deciding which season I am for fashions.  I'm talking about colors for our home.  Right now, the walls are white, the trim and doors are beige and the carpet is oatmeal. Couple that with the brown wood cabinets and off-white counters in the kitchen and you have a color-lovers worst nightmare!  

So I am trying to select colors for every room.  And because it's an open floor plan, I'm also trying to select colors to carry from one room or area to next without too many transitions.  

Then I found Lisa Carke's blog, Polka Dot Cottage, and a cool tool she found called The Color Palette Generator.  And suddenly I had found my answer.  

Lisa's post was about blogging the colours of our homes, using this tool.  But because the inside of my home right now lacks colour, and the outside is the development-mandated poop brown, I decided to use the tool to look at photos of places where I feel happy, hoping to find my the right shades and combinations to make our interior feel that way, too. 

So here goes.  

The first picture is a spot in Elizabethtown, Pa where I could stand or sit for hours just peacefully contemplating the view and life and everything else.

The second is from our wedding in March...the colours we used made me feel happy and hopeful and joyous.

And the third is from a hiking trip to Ocala last November....

Until this point, I had not really consider greens for the interior.  I was learning towards reds, burgundies, and other warm tones.  But the paint chips and samples just were not looking right with the house -- or to my eye.  


Now, I see why!  So greens look like the right choice for this house, for now in our lives.  Thank you Lisa, for seeding your blog post so I could find it!  

The days of Firsts

This weekend, my new husband and I bought our first pieces of furniture together. We also bought the power tool we needed to put it together. And we celebrated our first Shabbat as guests as a married couple. A few days ago, Lance first introduced me to someone new as his wife. And at the bank on Friday, I first signed my new name on an official document.

These are the days of firsts. For the next few months, there will be many firsts. And I am happy to be both experiencing them, and paying attention to them. They represent a new beginning for both of us. As time goes on, the number of "firsts" each week will decrease. But I want to bring this kind of awareness to our lives even when the second or third or twenty-eight time comes around.

No, I don't mean I plan to count each and every time we buy a household item or attend an event together. But I do want to maintain that awareness that every day with my husband is something new and special. Everyday presents a new opportunity for us to grow together, to experience our lives together, to move deeper into lasting and forever love.

G-d brought us together -- our story makes that clear. So in return for that miracle, I want to bring to my marriage the kind of mindfulness that such a divine act deserves.

So even when the kind of firsts you write in a wedding book have long since past, I will be looking for, and celebrating, the details and experiences of my life with my forever new husband.