Friday, 4 February 2011

Getting back into the game

I haven't posted on this blog since late December.  Since then, a lot has happened in my life. 

My new husband had to take an out-of-state job, so we are to be apart for several months of this precious first year.

My car developed serious electrical problems, and I am still trying to get them fixed because buying a new car isn't in the cards right now.

My daughter is still struggling with daily health issues, and we still don't know why or what is causing them.

And in mid January, my mom passed away. 

So with all of that, just keeping up with the blogs and other things I write for work took every ounce of energy I had.  I opened this page a dozen times, but no words came out...until now.

I am tired. Stressed.  Sometimes scared.  Bruised. But I can feel that there is life beneath the surface, like a river that is starting to move again beneath its winter skin of ice.  It's hard to see the change -- in fact, some days a cold, hard freeze seems to put me right back where I was. It could be a sleepless night, or a hard day at work, or something like today when I went to get my car, and found that it was not yet fixed...again.

But the freezes aren't lasting as long now.  Even when they hit, I am feeling that trickle of movement underneath the icy surface...that hint of springtime.  Not yet visible, and yet something I can sense in the air.

Spring is coming.  Maybe not today or tomorrow or even next week.  But it is heading this way. And then the words will flow again.


Chris said...

Hello, "Seeker,"
I got here from a link on my own blog ( from a bazillion years ago called "Advice to myself at 13", and I just want you to know that I enjoy your writing and your personality, and I've bookmarked you as someone to come back to for another look. I am an INFP, so we share a certain affinity, I think.

seeker said...

Thank you Chris. I have been neglecting my blog, dealing with so many other things, but that is about to change :-)

Rocky Mountain Woman said...

I have been having some of the same issues, the biggest being losing my mom last year. She lived in FL so it was an expensive, exhausting, emotionally draining few months..

I, too, though feel a little glimmer of hope for warm weather and a little lighter heart...