Thursday, 20 September 2007

On the 8th day of Ramadan

Today has been the hardest day so far.

I ate before dawn, but clearly not the right stuff. Shakey, sleepy, very thirsty. But I am getting through. The process is more important than my momentary comfort.

I just had a weird experience. I was updating my Facebook and the new app asked for my religion. I sat there for 10 minutes marking and unmarking two different boxes. I could not commit to where I have been for all these years, nor to where it seems I am going. I finally settled on "Multireligious" (yes that was one of the choices!) for now.

I feel that I am straddling a crevasse, trying to keep one foot on either side. Unfortunately (or perhaps fortunately?) the gap is widening and it is about time for me to make a choice.

That's what this fast is all about. Choices.

4 comments:

Sadiq Alam said...

May Beloved One guide you in your spiritual path and may you reach the Truth which is Beauty.

peace and blessings be with you. i am so glad to be able to know you! Praise be unto Him!

Kievas said...

I had that same experience recently, and described it exactly the same way that you did , although it was in a different context. I hope you find peace in your decision.

otowi said...

I remember feeling the same way. And being afraid of the big leap, I guess you could call it.

Now, 13 years later, I am a Muslim. But, I am American, and I am Christian. I think now I am more Christian than when I was Christian, if that makes any sense. I think, God willing, I am being more true to Jesus (peace be upon him) the way I live and believe now.

But I think everyone has their own journeys to make and own minds to make!

Seeker said...

I absoluteky agree. And the journey is as essential as the destination...without it, we wuld miss much of the value and many of lessons we need.